Wikipedia:Peer review/San Jose, California/archive1
This article has been greatly expanded in the last 18 months or so. While we know it's not perfect yet (if any article can truly be perfect), we'd like to nominate it for featured article status. A few more eyes looking at the article before that happens would help ensure its accecptance. Gentgeen 02:30, 30 Nov 2004 (UTC)
- Looks good. I made a few minor changes, but nothing drastic. Regarding the history, I'm wondering how San Jose came to be such a great place for high-tech companies - were there tax incentives or people just came for the view or what? It's one of the most important technological hubs in the U.S. - how did it get that way? Other than that, I'm not sure the article flows very well (but organizing a city page like this is tough), and in a few places the text doesn't read particularly well. But overall, looks like a winner that needs a bit more preparation. Spangineer 15:27, Dec 2, 2004 (UTC)
- One more thing - do you have any print references? It seems to me that "references" generally refer to printed material, while "external links" refer to website references. If my understanding is correct, that means that you have 4 external links and no references, which the featured article critics aren't going to like. It might help to find a couple books on San Jose history that confirm the information you have and include those. One of them could be the book that is excerpted from in the Flashback link. Spangineer 15:40, Dec 2, 2004 (UTC)
- Online references are acceptable, but should be formatted as shown at Wikipedia:Cite sources. Many people feel that online references are not as reliable, but that varies just like in print references. The goal is to get some of the most reliable references available, and enough to cover and verify all of the material in the article. Usually that would involve some print references, so I second that request. I quick trip to the local library should yield some good ones. - Taxman 22:24, Dec 6, 2004 (UTC)
- Separate comments I noticed are the map, the larger inset map is very confusing at first as to what it is. Can you get some arrows showing the zoom in or something? Also, many one and two sentence paragraphs throughout the article. Those show bad form, and highlight concepts that either need expanding or merging in with other paragraphs. - Taxman
- One more thing - do you have any print references? It seems to me that "references" generally refer to printed material, while "external links" refer to website references. If my understanding is correct, that means that you have 4 external links and no references, which the featured article critics aren't going to like. It might help to find a couple books on San Jose history that confirm the information you have and include those. One of them could be the book that is excerpted from in the Flashback link. Spangineer 15:40, Dec 2, 2004 (UTC)
- Minor point for the Sport Teams section - I believe that the XFL is defunct. You might want to clarify that or remove the Demons all together - Trick 23:20, 9 Dec 2004 (UTC)
- Comments:
- Great lead section.
- History section has one sentence paragraphs. These need to become proper paragraphs.
- Suggestion: turn those bullet points in the "Law and government" section into a table. Do what you will with that suggestion.
- I like your geography section. I think I'll use it as a model for my Municipality of Strathfield article.
- Those references need to be fixed. I count 9 wikilinks in [n] format, and only three references! I see vast amounts of material in there, but none of it referenced. Where are you getting your sources from? Do you have print resources? Council documents? Those links you do have need to be formatted correctly. I'd advise looking at cite your sources for more info.
- Overall, I can only say: darnit people! you keep raising the bar and I'll NEVER get my article to featured status :) Excellent work! You guys are almost there. Ta bu shi da yu 13:08, 30 Dec 2004 (UTC)
Ok, thanks for your help everyone. I've expanded the 1 and 2 sentence paragraphs in the history section, and will work on the city council members list in a bit. TBSDY, the [n] references you speak of are inline references, usually supporting the one or two facts immediatly before them. The three references at the bottom of the page are more general references, that support several areas of the article. I'd also like to expand the colleges list into a prose education section, as I think the bottom half of the article is a bit too list heavy. I might even go to my local library branch for a print reference or two, or maybe visit the monstrosity they call the Martin Luther King Library (who in their right mind combines a university and city library?) Any more suggestions will really be appriciated. Gentgeen 16:21, 6 Jan 2005 (UTC)
- In the infobox, I'd replace the Logo with the city flag and seal - similar to what is in the New York, New York, Chicago and Los Angeles. Ex: San Jose flag and San Jose seal -- DAVODD 22:18, Jan 6, 2005 (UTC)
- I've added the flag, but as the seal is on the flag, I think the logo provides more information than the seal would. Gentgeen 05:50, 11 Jan 2005 (UTC)
- The transportation section should mention transit buses, paratransit service, and the heritage streetcars used seasonally along the light rail line. Vaoverland 08:15, Jan 7, 2005 (UTC)
